Frogger

Nhung and Mike were fun traveling partners. They provided humor and put up with me being me. Thanks guys, I would travel with guys any time. Just exclude me from activities that start at 8am.... I ain't no farmer. Han oi, VN was quite a place. Exotic, chaotic, and fascinating. First adjustment was learning how to cross a street. It's like playing "Frogger" and chicken at the same time. Why did Mikey cross the road? To buy cigarettes and nicotine patches. We ain't scured.



I never saw ANY accidents. With the exception of Nhung's moped crash. Imagine female "Marvin the Martian" crashing a moped (Nhung is a small girl and the helmet looked so big on her). Luckily no one was physically hurt including the bahn me. However, 5 older Vietnamese men seemed emotionally traumatized by the scene.



View from a taxi. Those gray bags are full of bud, let torch that shit! Kumar, work your lighter.


Views from a cyclo. It feels like riding on the handlebars of a bike if the handlebars were a diner bench seat. Straight up vinyl, suhn.


Vietnamese cuisine is some of the best food I've had. Man it was sooo good. I didn't have one bad meal. Mike getting pho-ed up.



The rooster (next to his moped) that impregnated the chicken for Mike's pho. That's how they do in VN!


A complete meal should be followed by coffee. We decided to be ballers and drink only the finest coffee called kopi luwak (translation weasel coffee), it's the most expensive coffee in the world. Baiscally, it's coffee berries that passed thru the digestive tracts of a weasel. That's right, some weasel had to eat berries and shoot it out of its ahole (f-off PETA). That shit was gooood. No pun indented.

Let's do this shit!


That coffee ain't paying for itself.

After a long day of work and working it. Time for some cold ones.

Our new Aussie friends. They were recently married and were on their honeymoon. We learned a couple of things that night. Dave likes to drink, recorded a spoof song about white boys rapping which got airtime (he's now recording an album with his band in a studio where INSX recorded), and can make a bowl with one hand tied behind his back... (almost). His wife does not like being called Sandi (or was it Simone), formally from Vancouver, and doesn't like being left without keys to the hotel room and without any money. We also confirmed that toilet water flushes clockwise in Australia and Aussies don't drink Fosters cause its crap (Chalk one up for higher learning).

After a long night of drinking, it was time to get some eats. No McDeez for us, fuck dat. We do street food. This street food restaurant was something special. Plastic tables and chairs with the restaurant floor covered in carcass and trash. We channeled our inner Andrew Zimmerman and order pork chops and roasted pigeon. Mike Tyson wants to race pigeon, while we wants them dead and roasted on our plates. I can confirm roasted pigeon tastes like chicken with the gaminess of duck.









Eating summer rolls while getting a pedi right before a massage. The massage was relaxing and interesting. First you're completely nude (which I prefer) and during the thigh message, she kept grazing my boyz. Nhung got the same treatment (her girls), while Mike didn't. I dunno. When in Rome do what the Romans do, adjust your appendages... accordingly.

After he tore up that pigeon like it was popeyes cajun goodness, Mikey gave us a fun little history lesson on Hồ Chí Minh Mausoleum. I'll let wiki explain. "In his will, Ho Chi Minh stated his wish to be cremated and to have his ashes scattered in the hills of north, central, and southern Vietnam. He said that he preferred cremation because it would be "more hygienic than burial and would also save land for agricultural purposes". The mausoleum was built in spite of his wishes." Funny. Well what is he gonna do, he's dead.

Changing of the guards. Outfit straight from the Sean John collection, Communist chic.


Oh pics of cool architecture in Han oi.